Curve Ball Laugh

Up until this evening, I harbored a very secret ambition: I wanted to be the first retired ELCA pastor with cancer to make the bullpen of the Cleveland Indians.

I thought I had a pretty good chance because, last night, the bullpen imploded again like they were sorely ill, and lately, on Mondays, I have been taking a steroid as part of my treatment. It had the same effect every week. Taking the dexamethasone steroid on Monday, my strength and vigor and thinking ability exploded on Monday and Tuesday, then waned slightly on Wednesday, plummeted on Thursday and Friday, and slowly began climbing out of the trough on Saturday and Sunday.

Now I know why those ball players want steroids! It turned me into a macho machine. I hardly remembered that I had cancer. I was just about to call Tommy Lehman, recently unemployed catcher for the Firestone High School Falcons due to his graduation, and ask him if he would be available the next few Mondays and Tuesdays to help me get my arm in shape. I figured Major League Baseball would never check me for steroids. Heck, look how long it took for them to check Roger Clemens! And I’m an old retired, cancered, ELCA pastor!

But then Dr. Reu from the Cleveland Clinic called this evening with some of my test results from last Thursday. He asked how I was. I told him I was pretty good, since it was TUESDAY! That’s when he wiped out my second career baseball plans. He said that the body is pretty quick to catch on to that weird steroid thing, and very soon, adjusts everything to even it all out: soon, the highs are not as high and the lows are not so low. I guess our bodies are lot a closer to catching on to these things than the baseball authorities.So I will soon be back to mere mortal strength and vigor. Well actually, tomorrow is Wednesday, so I won't really know until next Monday..

The good news Dr. Reu had was that the PET scan showed no significant bone damage, only very minor things that would not require bone strengthening medication at this time. He does want a bone mineral density test, like people have for an osteoporosis check, because a thinning of the bones would not show up on the PET scan. They are so careful about the bones because, once the damage is done, it is very hard to fix, and bone damage is one of the main culprits in multiple myeloma. It can leave you in great pain, or even paralyzed.

The bone marrow biopsy results will not be in for a week or two since this is a much more complicated genetic test.

So hey, when you get the chance to have a little fun, in the midst of this disease, you better go for it. Whose in charge here anyway!?

BY THE WAY, SEE THE LITTLE BOX UP AT THE UPPER RIGHT CORNER? IF YOU GIVE IT YOUR EMAIL ADDRESS IT WILL SEND YOU AN EMAIL WHEN THERE IS A NEW BLOG POST.